usullusa: (Doctor Who: Face that nobody listens to)
I have a rant. It's about my weight and my consumption of food.

I am really damn tired of people commenting about how skinny I am. I am sick of people exclaiming that they can see my ribs or making dissaproving noises when I decline to eat or eat very little.

Look. I have several digestive illnesses. Cut for length )
usullusa: Matt from Deathnote (Default)
This academic year has been a really good year for my stomach. I'm lactose intolerant and have something called IBS (Irritable Bowl Syndrome), which actually just means they have no idea what I have but they really wish I would stop coming to the office and bothering them so here, have a bs diagnosis. But anyway. I have something. Which makes my stomach hate me. I've wondered if it was one of those ninja cases of Celiac Disease where the symptoms are subtle, but I don't think that is it. My stomach is just... sensitive. If I eat something that I ate the day before and was fine, I might end up curled up in pain. If it's that-time-of-month-of-which-we-shall-not-speak I stop being able to process food. If I'm stressed, you can bet I will end up in enough pain that things like breathing are agony. I have prescription painkillers and digestive supplements and probiotics and herbal god-knows-what and all to little effect.

But surprisingly a big lifestyle change has made things a lot better. When I started my second year of college I didn't sign up for a meal plan. Nor do I have enough money to eat out, so I have to cook for myself every single day. I don't really like to half-ass things so I tend to cook a proper dinner every night. And since I do my own groceries now I'm really aware of what I'm putting into my body. I'm not one of those people that checks the ingredients for trans fats, but I don't buy junk food or frozen meals and if I have a choice I'll pick the healthier option. Surprisingly (or maybe not surprisingly) it's done wonders for my stomach. That wasn't my goal. I was just trying to get food that tasted good and avoid putting bad things into my body if it was as easy as reaching for a different shelf. I used to be in pain almost every day. Now I can go weeks without hurting or feeling ill. It's actually baffling not having pain as a constant background. But it's nice. I'm enjoying it. I have no idea what it is that was making me so sick all the time. I suppose it's some ingredient in processed food that I'm managing to avoid by sheer accident. Or maybe my diet is more balanced, though I still don't eat nearly enough vegetables. I'm certainly not stressed any less. I may actually be more stressed. But it seems to be okay. It would be nice to figure it out, but for now I'm happy to be mostly pain-free.

Ironically, as soon as I had the idea for this entry a week ago, I was stricken with a stomach ache that lasted four days.
usullusa: Matt from Deathnote (Default)
How do guys survive without handbags? They are the most useful thing ever. Seriously. Sometimes I'm like, ugh this is the most ridiculously girly thing ever and I don't want to carry it around. BUT THEN I HAVE NOWHERE TO PUT ANYTHING. And I feel twitchy shoving my credit card in my pocket. And my phone. And my keys. And my- you get the idea.

Oh and I made pineapple upside down cake (I kept on calling it pineapple turnover cake) last night with [ profile] sythia Suddenly our apartment was flooded with people. What an odd coincidence. <_< For the record, it was delicious. I've always liked baking way more than cooking for whatever reason.
usullusa: Matt from Deathnote (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] Not in the tiniest bit. I have plenty of dietary restrictions thanks to various digestive problems. I can't have anything containing milk. Raw fish sets off my IBS. Sometimes completely random things that I've eaten before will make me sick and then be fine the next time. I have a bizarre phobia of tomatoes that I count as a dietary restriction because my response to them is so visceral. (Seriously, I would rather eat roadkill than a tomato.) To be truthful, the only time I've ever felt 100% was when I went on a fruit-and-vegetable-only diet on doctor's orders.

But I can happily say that I've never counted calories. It seems like a pretty miserable way to live. Food is already enough of a problem for me that I can't imagine making it anymore difficult without a really excellent reason. Anyway, eating well is a much better way to stay healthy then counting calories.
Growing up in a immigrant family I never got into the habit of eating junk food. In Russia there was practically no such thing so it was just never around the house even when we came to the United States. I guess I'm lucky in that respect.

So there's that. I'm making shrimp tonight by the way. My mother has a very particular way of making shrimp that is delicious but unique to her kitchen so I'm not sure exactly what she puts in it. She's on vacation at the moment. I guess I'll be improvising.


Sep. 10th, 2009 09:29 pm
usullusa: Matt from Deathnote (Default)

  • None of the places I applied to have gotten back to me. Applying to a few more things tonight hopefully. I know I shouldn't complain because it's only been two weeks and many others have been unemployed for months. Still, the prospect of having to call my parents and beg them for money if this keeps up fills me with shame. Not because it's embarrassing but because I feel like such a douche asking them for money when they're already doing so much for me.
  • I am going to try making a really yummy sounding fried asparagus recipe tonight. I also want to get the recipe for tulma from my mom. It's ground meat and rice wrapped in grape leaves and it is one of my favorite foods ever.
  • I finally bought Jane Yolen's Dragon's Heart today. Even though it's in hardcover. I read the first 3 books when I was in elementary school and fell in love with them. I read those books many, many times. So I feel like I can treat myself to the long awaited sequel.
  • Fucking hell. Japanese. HALP!
  • Today was the first time I successfully managed to bind my breasts. Just to see if I could finally get it to work. (Don't ask me why, but I've always failed at it before). The best I had was a thin decorative scarf, but it worked quite well. Pardon my frankness, but I have really small breasts and aside from the obvious convenience of this, it also means I can basically make them disappear if I want. Which is cool.
    I need to find baggier pants and whatnot. I have no idea where to get guys clothes that might fit a small person like me. (I'm barely 5'4" and waifishly thin.) Every time I've ever walked into a men's clothing store it was 1. fruitless 2. made me feel humiliated for no apparent reason. One time I was with [ profile] sythia and the store lady had an oohhh moment and then gave [ profile] sythia a sympathizing look. I kind of died on the spot. Anyway, I have been told that GAP has very small clothing, but I don't know if that holds true for the men's section.


usullusa: Matt from Deathnote (Default)

April 2011


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